Let's get it started... I NEED to wish my girlie happy birthday and I WANT her to know she rocks socks and city blocks.

There needs to be some funny in here... but for now let me tell a pirate her worth.

Elle-

First and most importantly- HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY BITCH!

I read you for a long time. I always laughed. Even the ones that were sad, mad, or grumpy had a twist that would make giggle and think "this broad is just like me". It took FOREVER for me to comment. Years for me to email. I'm not shy or anything, I'm just not a weirdo. But you were SO fucking much like me. Beautiful bi-racial children, crackies in the family, etc. Even more than we knew. Once we became close friends we discovered random things like babies with the same bday, and the same middle initial. It was instant close friendship for me... and again- I am so not a weirdo....

It was an instant friendship because we fucking rock (Princess too! Holla!).

During this time, you have been there for me more than once whether you knew or not, whether it was something you actively did or just some crazy shit you posted on a day when I needed a laugh to keep me from crying. You loved my babies instantly and suffered through enough photos to make a family album. You sent me pinnochio with a penis for a nose. That is a true friend.

You and Princess showed me some light when I thought my days turned dark- No, seriously- I paid my PG&E bill- that shit right there I will never forget.

You, my friend, are a beautiful soul.

Thank you for being a true bitch- women like you are hard to come by (some folks better keep that in mind when they start being more chicken than bacon).

Thank you for listening to me, laughing with me, loving me.

Thank you for answering my email.

Because I could've been a weirdo...


* I realize that it is only 11pm so I am technically a day ahead but it will be your bday when you see it, so my ass is right on time.